If You Experience These 7 Signs, The Universe is Showing You Synchronicity
These are the 7 signs that you might be addicted to porn
Or does your boyfriend have a porn addiction?
At the height of Jack’s* porn addiction, he would lose up to six hours a day to watching porn. Scrolling from clip to clip on platforms such as YouPorn, or clicking through social media and streaming services, each video another girl, another kick. He drifted from vanilla scenes, to anal, to graphic group sex. And after every orgasm, he’d feel guilty and ashamed. ‘The final straw was when I woke up at 3am one morning with my pyjama bottoms around my ankles and an empty bottle of poppers on the floor [to accentuate orgasm],’ says Jack. ‘I sat there and cried.’ Unable to hide his habit any longer, he told his girlfriend. ‘She already knew and we both realised I needed help.’
Jack, 23, from, London is one of a growing number of Brits admitting to having a porn addiction. Last year, 64 million people worldwide watched porn every day – that’s the equivalent of the entire population of the UK. And it’s not just a male issue. One in three visitors to porn websites in 2019 were female. But when does watching porn go from something that people ‘just do’ to something more sinister?
We spoke to a representative from the Vice Chair of the Association for the Treatment of Sexual Addiction and Compulsivity (ATSAC) about what to look out for if you think you, or your partner, may have a porn addiction. ‘When I started out as a sex therapist I thought porn addiction would be a niche, but now I see more than 20 people a week for porn addiction, and more than 90 per cent of them feature on the scale of what you might call problematic sexual behaviours, or sexual addiction.’
Porn addiction: what to look for
1. ‘The first question I ask when I meet a new client is “do you find yourself preoccupied, fantasising about, planning or recovering from sexual behaviours?” Lots of people are happy drinking and can do so recreationally, but for some, alcohol has a greater role to play, it becomes a form of self-soothing. It is the same with porn, although porn tends to have a greater shame attached to it than other addictions. The problem with porn, for addicts, is that you cannot abstain in the same way. You can stop going to bars or pubs, or remove yourself from situations where there will be alcohol, but you can’t remove yourself from your sensuality or sexuality.’
2. ‘Next I ask, “do your behaviours have a negative impact on your relationship or your ability to start a relationship?” Watching porn, even regularly, does not necessarily make you a porn addict. Equally, the impact of someone watching porn can be devastating to their partner, even if the person is not an addict, if it conflicts with their values on life. People have views on fox-hunting, porn, Brexit. What brings people together in a relationship is commonality.’
3. ‘Do your habits have a negative impact on your family, work, social life, relaxation time, finances or friends? In this job, I see people who are watching porn at 2am in order to hide it from people, and I also work with people who have been fired for watching porn at work.
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